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More restrictions for motorists.
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rights, freedoms and repression |
opinion/analysis
Friday November 18, 2005 18:02 by John McDermott - removefiannafail Spain

Martin Cullen strikes again.
New Draconian road rules may hoist Martin on his own Petard (if he ever loses his personal chauffeur)!
 Wee Martin, up to his tricks again. Cullen rolls out yet more road rules.
Today a number of new amendments specifically targeting errant "Soldiers of Destiny" like Martin Cullen, have been added to the current Fianna Fail list of 69 odd driving offences,listed on the new Road Traffic Bill-all of which attract penalty points,should the computerized system which compiles such records ever swing into action. Mr Ahern, has announced that ministers who violate them will then be punished. A severe "rap on the knuckles" awaits wrongdoers," nobody is above the law, in Fianna Fail" said Bertie.
NEW TRAFFIC LAWS TARGET MARTIN CULLEN; (Subject to "rolling out" the new computers!)
(1)Violation; Lighting up another cigarette, while your vehicle is in motion.
(Offence; Observed driving with one hand on the steering wheel )
(2)Violation; Dropping the hand while a beautiful P.R. consultant is in the front passenger seat.
(Offence; observed,with one hand in an inappropriate place, and not in full control of a moving vehicle)
(3)Violation; Passing out, on the M 50, and other arterial routes near Dublin.
(Offence;observed falling asleep,in a semi- paralized,or comatose state, after sitting for hours in traffic jams)
(4)Violation; Farting ,while belching carcinogenic fumes
(Offence; polluting the vehicle interior with stale tobacco smoke,and other noxious gases.Windbagging the media,with lots of hot air,on a daily basis.
(5)Violation; Unsafe sex,with a P.R. consultant, in the rear seat of a government vehicle while stalled in a traffic jam.
(Offence; Effecting an inappropriate cockup, in a public place )
(6)Violation; Overloading vehicles,including Ministerial Mercedes.
(Offence;Transporting excess E-voting junk,computers,etc. to the dump, without a waste disposal permit)
(7)Violation; Refusing to stop, when requested to do so.
(Offence; Going too far with Monica. Wasting a fortune in taxpayers money.
(8) Violation;Writing on cigarette packets while stopped at traffic lights
(Offence;Costing the new infrastructure and transport plan, in an inappropriate place)
(9)Violation; Daydreaming while in charge of a vehicle.
Offence;Driving erratically,while scheming to railroad the electorate with fantastic tales of interconnecting trains, tunnels,Metros, motorways,etc-and whatever your having yourself.!
(10)Violation;Dangerous driving, in a contrary manner,and direction, on a dual carriageway,while pissed drunk.!
Offence; Driving outside the Republic of Donegal without a certificate of sobriety.
(11)Violation; Seriously injuring pedestrians while blind drunk,and in charge of a murder machine.
Offence; Wright hypocrisy,(by Fianna Fail T.D/ publicans in Dail Eireann)
FINALLY A NEW LAW TO BRING ERRANT GARDAI INTO LINE.
(12)Violation; Carrying out a random breathalyser test,on any dazed looking motorist as his vehicle departs the car park, outside a packed public house.
Offence; Unwarranted interference with the profitability of the Licenced Vintners trade.Punishment; instant dismissal from the Force.!
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Jump To Comment: 1 2 3A new poem.
More easy money (from your T.V. licence fees) in the Four Goldmines, for Monica.?
PR CONSULTANT Monica Leech is sued RTE for libel after comments made by a caller on the Joe Duffy Show.The case began in the High Court in November 2005
Ms Leech, who earned more than €300,000 for her work as a communications advisor to Environment Minister Martin Cullen, heard the 'Liveline' broadcast on her car radio in December last year.
The PR consultant, who recently became CEO of Waterford Chamber of Commerce, claims she heard the broadcast live while driving in her car and was extremely shocked, distraught and shaken.
It is claimed that in November and December 2004, Ms Leech, a self-employed communications consultant, of Otteran Place, South Parade, Waterford, was the subject of prominent and sustained media coverage by RTE and other media organisations.
In honour of the event; a new poem from Ireland,s political Poet Laureate.
Monica Leech, you we beseech,
Joe Duffy not to pur-sue.
He,s a decent old chap, so dont be a slap-
A listener just said something blue.!"
We all know you suck,bad cess and bad luck
to you Soldiers of Destiny;
There,s a stealth charge or fee; every time that we pee,
And from all of your taxes, we will never be free.!
The people are muffled, so your feathers aint ruffled,
you rule with strict secrecy,
And the Soldiers escape, from each pertinent jape,
When off to the high court they flee.!
So Monica Leech, you we beseech,
get down off your hobby horse now.
Leave R.T.E. alone,you greedy old crone,
And stop sucking the "slandermilk cow".!
The first lady of Waterford.
Fianna Fail sucks.
McDowell,s bright ideas.?
A shoulder to cry on,- funded by fianna Fail.?
A NEW crime victims' helpline was launched in November 2005 by Justice Minister Michael McDowell.
The number is 1850 211407 and it operates from 10am to 4pm, Monday to Friday.
The line, manned by well paid Fianna Fail supporters, is intended to provide a contact point for other organisations providing comfort, succour,and councilling for crime victims around the country.
Funding for the groups is determined by a special commission (Bertie,s cronies) and headed by former assistant Garda commissioner,Jim McHugh.
More than 60 applications for funding have been received and so far 24 have been approved with another 16 in the pipeline.
A network of good samaritans across the country will attempt to alleviate the pain and loss, and assuage the anger felt by victims. Chat lines will listen sympathetically to the harrowing stories of families left bereaved: drunken drivers,and T.D,s receiving suspended sentences and derisory fines(McDaid, Wright,etc); witnesses of harrowing murders living in fear and refusing to testify,etc. etc.
Mr McDowell said there was a great tradition of volunteering in this country and he paid tribute to the work done in the different areas of need.
He agreed that criminality is widespread and endemic on the Island of Ireland. " Corruption, thieving, robberies, rapes, murders,and drug related offences are out of control,and that there is little the Gardai can do to prevent it." he remarked.
"My own associates in the legal profession have made a few bob recently investigating these matters,but even if you locked up the whole Cabinet and every crooked Fianna Fail T.D. in the country,it would hardly put a dent in it",he added.
"Fine Gael and Labour would be just more of the same, however you know you can trust Mary,myself and the rest of the P.D.s so give us your vote and we will keep our eye on whichever Mafia is elected.."
And in my times of trouble mother Mary comes to me,speaking words of wisdom-let it be ,let it be.
its big swinging mickey Mc dowell
or
9mm willie o'dea.
Were it not for the Mammy Harney or hedgeschool Hanafin we'd have a very phallic government.